The "Perfect" Woman

Whenever I watch a movie or TV show, I notice that most female characters look the same: perfect. They have beautiful clothes and perfect hair, and if they wear makeup (which they usually do), it is flawless. It’s okay for girls to want to look their best, but, in my experience, the expectations for beauty we find in the media can be incredibly unrealistic.

In the movies, women always wear amazing, fashionable, wrinkle-free clothing. You never see pieces of their hair or animal hair on their clothes, either! Can I just say that I would love to wake up and be able to magically have the perfect outfit!? I don’t know about you, but for me, getting dressed in the morning is a challenge. When I wake up and go to get dressed, usually all the clothes I like are in the laundry, which makes things ten times harder. For some reason, I am unable to tell if my clothes look good together. I am always asking my mom or brother if they match! If I didn’t have them, I’d be a mess. Once I find a good outfit, it usually needs to be ironed. After ironing it, I am good to go....until I realize I have dog fur all over my back, and sometimes even my own hair! Lint rollers are definitely a lifesaver in my house. Right now I am wearing jeans and a black Sin City motorsports shirt, and yes, there is dog fur all over it! That’s just something that I’ve learned to accept. My clothes can’t always look perfect, and that’s okay.

It also bugs me that women in the media always have perfectly tamed hair in a nice updo or style. I get that it’s easier for some people to do their hair nicely. For me, my hair is a fluffy, frizzy mess in the morning, and sometimes it goes back to being a fluffy, frizzy mess at the end of the day. And if I’ve ever been to your house, I’ve probably left strands of my hair somewhere, and I’m sorry. It falls out everywhere and gets in people’s faces...honestly, it has a mind of its own. It also seems like the perfect girl in movies is usually blonde. Most Disney princesses are blonde. But you don’t have to be blonde to be beautiful. I say all this, and here I am with my hair dyed a golden blond color. The media tells us that we have to have perfect, blond hair to be attractive, but that’s not true.

Somehow, people on TV and in the movies always have flawless makeup and skin. In the TV show Reign, one of the characters, Clarissa, has a facial deformity, and everyone is afraid of her and trays to kill her. I’m just saying, if having makeup that’s not on point was punishable by the death, I’d definitely be dead. At this moment, I’m walking around with a super dark color foundation on. If you were all to look, which I suggest you don’t because that would be super embarrassing, you would probably notice that my face and neck are two totally different shades.

Everyone is beautiful in different ways. Major cliche, I know, but it’s true. I challenge you to go look in a mirror right now, and instead of thinking about the things you don’t like, look at the things you love about yourself and think, “I look great!” because you do! Think “I’m beautiful” because you are!

-A

Forgiveness

   I have not posted in awhile and thought I would post a short little blog today. These past few days I've really been tested and some of the things that happened do not necessarily deserve an "it's okay." To be able to move on though there needs to be an "I forgive you."

   There is a quote by Jonathan Lockwood Huie that says, "Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve peace." I believe this one hundred percent! Sometimes the situation is so big or crazy that you do not want to say "it's okay", because in all honesty it is not. However the ability to say "I forgive you", does not tell them everything is okay and that you are forgetting everything, but it tells them you are okay enough to move forward and have peace in your life. 

   In my experience I realized that I needed to forgive the other person to be able to move on with my life. I took a little bit of time to understand why that person had done what they had. I also thought about what I needed to do, so that I could move on and be okay. In the end I was able to move on to an extent and I feel a lot better about what happened. 

  I will leave you with one more quote by C.S Lewis. "Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward." I encourage you all to find the peace you need and move forward. Forgive someone you have not yet forgiven today.

-A

Everything Will Be Okay

   Today on Facebook I saw this picture, and it was exactly what I needed to see. Last night my engagement ended and I was set on moving on and trying to jump into a new relationship. I kept thinking to myself, "I am ready to get married and ready to have a family." Even though that is still very true I should not be trying to jump into things right away.
   After reading this picture I felt a lot more at ease. I know that everything will all work out and that everything is going to be okay. I believe that my ex fiance was and is the guy for me (as pathetic as that sounds), but not now. If I am right about us I do believe the Lord will bring us back together in the future, and that things will be better. If not, it will also be okay.
-A

**This blog was created originally to document my engagement and future marriage, but I do intend to keep it up with just everyday stuff. :)

Be Timeless

     I recently read an article on Facebook called "The Truth About Meeting Someone at the Wrong Time." (It was written by Heidi Priebe.) I encourage you all to go read it. It was such a good  read and very insightful.
     What really stood out in this article to me was that it mentioned meeting the person of our dreams a month before they go study abroad. I've mentioned before that my fiance is out of state at school. I met him 6 months before he left, and I admit it was very hard to know he'd be leaving. Before he left we got engaged. I've always heard how long distance relationships don't work. I was worried when it came to mine, but we were always able to work through concerns.
      In the article it does say, "the people we meet at the wrong time are actually the wrong people." Well I do believe that, I don't believe it is the same with my relationship. Let me tell you why. My fiance and I worked really hard to keep thing going. I would go to visit once or twice a month, and during that time we did talk about a lot, but we also just enjoyed each others company.
     The author talked about what it was like to be with the right person. She said," when you are with the right person time falls away." I never had to worry about fitting my fiance in. We weren't in the same state, but we texted all day and at least once a week talked on FaceTime or the phone. It didn't matter what we were doing. I know I've done homework while on FaceTime with him. We never held each other back from anything either. Talking from personal experience, it is hard to keep a long distance relationship together, but knowing that this is the person for you helps and it becomes a habit to call once a week or text "goodnight" every night. They become part of the "busy schedule" mentioned in the article.
    In closing Heidi Priebe says,"Because when someone is right for us, we make the time to let them into our lives. And that kind of timing is always right." As I said earlier I have made that time for my fiance and he makes the time for me. It's really not a hard thing to do. You would think flying out of state would be hard to plan and make the timing for. It really isn't.  I would fly out Friday night and come home Sunday night. Yes, it wasn't a lot of time but it we knew we'd see each other again. Here's something for all you reading to remember, be timeless!
-A

The article: http://thoughtcatalog.com/heidi-priebe/2014/11/the-truth-about-meeting-someone-at-the-wrong-time/  (I used quotes from this article in this blogpost)

What I Want in a Future Husband

     I was looking through some boxes of old things today when I found an activity I did when I was  15, at church. I was asked to write down what I wanted in a future husband. While dating I looked for most of these in the guys I went out with. Now that I am getting married I found it nice to look back on this sheet and reflect on the qualities I look for. 
    The first thing on my list is that they will go to church with me. My fiance does go to church with me. He too is LDS and every time I visit him at school we go to church on Sunday. I have also been to church with his family. This past visit we went with some family friends and while attending their ward were able to see their baby blessing. Being there for that blessing just made me want to raise my kids in the church and have them blessed in the church. I want my kids to be able to have faith and the gospel in their lives. I am confident in the fact that my fiance will support me and our future family in attending the church. 
    Also on my list was that they like kids. My fiance definitely has this quality. I have had the opportunity to see this multiple times with his nephew or his cousins. I am confident in saying that he will be an amazing father, and I look forward to sharing those moments with him. 
    Educated was next on my list. He is without a doubt educated, and is also continuing his education. He not only is educated, but supportive in me continuing my education. He has gone down to the university for me a couple times, I believe. He also provides the council I need for this too. If I am freaking out over getting accepted or getting in contact with enrollment (which happens quite often) he listens to me and calms me down in no time! 
     In my future husband I wanted someone who was honest. I found that in my fiance! Sometimes I do not want to hear the truth, but he always tells me the truth. I really appreciate it, even when I do not show it.
    The last thing on my list is that he is respectful. Like the qualities previously stated my fiance falls into this category. He was very respectful when meeting my parents, and they really do like him! 
    All of these qualities are important to me, and I did enjoy reflecting on if I truly found the husband I want. I strongly encourage all of you to make up your own list of what you look for in a future husband or wife. Reflect over the qualities you wrote down, and see if your husband, fiance, or boyfriend have the qualities you want. I hope you all find who you are looking for and have the life you want!
-A

June Twelfth

     My first post will be on the title of my blog! June 12th is the day that I got engaged, to my fiance. We got engaged at the Mesa Temple in front of the pool. Before I get into the engagement let me tell you about how I met my fiance.

     We met through LDS planet, an online dating site. At first I was not proud to admit I had gone on one and met someone. I had heard so many negative things about dating sites, and did not want people to think any less of me. Due to my "fear" of being made fun of or looked down upon I would tell people that I met my fiance through the church, and let them go where ever they wanted with that. It was not until a month into dating him that I started to not care about what others thought. I liked being with him and no one could change those feelings.

      Our first date was in the middle of January (I think the 27th) at Golf Land. I really enjoyed talking to him and spending time with him, but I did not see any relationship coming out of it. I was supposed to meet up with him again a couple days later, but was not sure I really wanted to. I was talking to a friend about it and she told me that it couldn't hurt to go out with him one more time! I'm glad she told me that, because if she hadn't I would not be where I am today.  On the second date we met up at Dave and Busters and had a fantastic time (at least I did)! We were dating for five months before he proposed.

     Now for the night of June 12th. I drove out to Mesa to go workout at the gym with him. We finished working out, and my fiance told me that he wanted to go to the temple. I had thought it a little weird at first, but got on board quick. When we got to the temple we walked around for a little bit, then made our way to the front of the temple. We were sitting on the bench when he asked how I felt about us. I was a bit confused about the question, but said I felt good about how things were going. That's when he got down on one knee and proposed!! Of course I said yes, and we are planning a wedding for June of 2016.

   Fast forward to today, August 25th.  My fiance is currently in Northern California attending chiropractic school, and I miss him like crazy every day. Having a long distance relationship is hard, but is definitely worth every minute! I go visit him every month. I am currently applying to California State University and am hoping to start attending in the Fall of 2016.

   My posts will not normally be this long, and hope that everyone continues to read my blog. I am looking forward to be able to share wedding planning and my life after with you!

-A